First served

For those of you who routinely turn left when they enter an aeroplane, the following might make you realise why your money has been so well spent. For those of us who turn right, it’s another reason to curse the apartheid that is the airline class system. But flying up front isn’t just good for your social standing, but your health.

Leg room
Feature: International first class seats usually have between 147 and 234 cm of seat pitch, so you’ll have enough room to stretch your legs out fully, stretch your back, touch your toes and generally sprawl yourself like a yogi without having to invade anyone’s privacy.
Health bonus: Any flight over five hours holds the serious threat of deep vein thrombosis.

Air quality
Feature: The advantage in the front’s air quality comes from the fact that you’re sharing the air with less people, and so are taking in more oxygen – and you’re near the cockpit, whose air supply is greater still. That never reaches the cattle at the back.
Health bonus: Avoid nausea, viruses, headache and absentmindedness. Also, sitting in first class will mean the captain is more likely to adjust the cabin temperature to your needs.

Gourmet meals
Feature: Airlines will offer much more “health conscious” food choices here. On Emirates, you can have cappuccino, fresh orange juice and muesli for breakfast, okra soup and, get this, glazed duck for lunch.
Health bonus: Dining here will be gentler on your digestive system, since the food in economy seems to be designed specifically to generate flatulence. And vomiting in the under 5s.

Lavatories
Feature: The small number of people in the front means the bathrooms will always be cleaner and more readily available. In the Royal Jordanian A340, there’re 24 passengers, and two lavatories to serve them, compared to economy’s one bathroom per 46 persons.
Health bonus: Holding in your urine can lead to scorching pain when you urinate, sore testicles, and a dependence on Depends.

Privacy
Feature: All airlines have some sort of dividers between first class passengers, allowing you to pick your nose and cry at the film without feeling self-conscious. And for your social moods, Qatar Airways’ A340 features an onboard lounge where you can enjoy a bit of sherry with the hot girl from 3C.
Health bonus: Not being judged by your neighbour – or spending your flight judging them – alleviates stress to the point where you can actually enjoy your flight.

Fly First Class in the Middle East and even us men get a pampering kit all our own

Emirates
Roger & Gallet cologne
Freshscent deodorant
Bulgari refreshing towel
Plax mouthwash
Chrome aftershave balm
Gillette shaving foam
Kleenex
Colgate toothpaste
Toothbrush
Brush and comb

Royal Jordanian
Bulgari body lotion
Bulgari green tea cologne
Sleep mask
Earplugs
Toothbrush
Shoehorn
Socks
Comb

Qatar Airways
Bulgari hand cream
Bulgari lip balm
Bulgari body lotion
Bulgari refreshing towel
Plax mouthwash
Brush
Toothbrush
Earplugs
Napkins, cotton pads and cotton swabs