Moose of all Trades 6

For some reason, the Arabic word to describe someone who owns or operates a fruit and vegetables shop has a derogatory connotation. Maybe it is residual effect of when a desk job at a useless governmental office started acquiring a social status greater than farm-related professions. Or maybe the local word “khodarji” (loosely translated: vegetable-arian) is simply harsher than the “fakahani” of other dialects (loosely translated: fruit-itionist). Either way, after another month in front of the computer screen and after one month of putting up with a demanding boss, I was looking forward to exploring new career opportunities.

 

Arriving at Abu Ahmad’s shop at 8am, I realised that I’ve already missed out on one of my most important tasks: unloading the dozen or so boxes from the morning truck. Needless to say, neither Abu Ahmad nor Nasser (my co-worker/foreman) were not happy about it and they instantly put me to work. Honestly, I did not mind stacking the fruits on the shelves or taking the empty polystyrene boxes out – compared to hard labour in the morning sun that task is as hard as interviewing Nelly Karim.

 

Nasser proceeded to explain my other duties: “It’s mainly customer service stuff: pointing out prices when asked, putting the bags on the scale, and carrying them to the customer’s car.” He failed to mention dealing with grumpy housewives complaining about how expensive everything is while walking back to their $80,000 SUV.

 

The best way to realise how impossible making fruits and vegetables a part of one’s daily diet has become is by working the cash register. As Abu Ali stepped out of the shop, Nasser agreed to let me assume the most coveted position in the shop. A watermelon, seven peaches and six apples came up to a total of 6JDs ($9). “I am only paying five. That is just insane,” said one lady, and Nasser helplessly winked at me for approval. 

 

With the absence of a government-set prices,it is obvious that a “khodarji” is a well-compensated occupation – as long as you own the shop, of course. It sure beats being stuck behind a computer screen for 70 hours a week. Any investing partners?

 

 

 

Hours lasted: Four 

Difficulty: Some heavy lifting (which I dodged). Extended hours of standing. Temptation to eat unwashed products.

Money earned: A bag of cucumbers and faqqooss. Total weight of about 2kgs.

Career possibilities: All I need is an Emirates-based investor and we are taking over the world.

Market analysis: Buying three apples and a little vine of grapes is a luxury that a few can afford. Kind of like lentils.