Our dreams of democracy have fallen under constraints that are worse than our worst nightmares.

Looks like Muntather Zaidi had a taste of his own medicine. And like the Iraqi journalism guidebook says; a shoe for a shoe.

This is the result of excessively using Google translate and not bothering to check it afterwards. This "menu" caused us to waste 30 precious minutes of our time in the office while laughing at it. If you know the restaurant mentioned in the "menu" then please thank them for their amazing sense of humour and tell them that we want to order a dish of "Thickness of Elephants Proud", with a side of "My Hair", and for an appetizer a small dish of "Authority Cabbage".

Aaron Siebers is a 29-year-old man who claimed he was attacked and stabbed by three strangers. Later on he confessed that it was all his own doing, simply because he didn't want to go to work.

NOX should really start rethinking what prizes we give away to readers... While we had a solar backpack and electric shields up for grabs in our GI Joe contest , Somalia's "Educational Scientific Jihad" give-aways list included a Kalashnikov, grenades, and – get this – a laptop.

In a world filled with killings and guns, the natural thing is to wear bulletproof clothes. Now why didn't anyone think of that before!?

Police in Germany are putting some kebab chilli sauce under the microscope to determine if it's "capable of causing grievous bodily harm when used in an attack". This has proven necessary after a kebab salesman threw it into the eyes of a customer during a fight over – and this is imporatnt, filks – napkins. Ah, you can take can take the Turks out of Turkey...

Researchers in New Zealand have spent precious time, energy and money to conclude that almost half of men look at a woman's breasts before any other feature on her body. Gasp. While we appreciate the led images this allows us to post on the blog, we now know why there's still no cure for cancer...

In the perfect example of unconscious sabotage, an article in Brandeis Univeristy's student newspaper said that its vice president of financial affairs Maureen Murphy was leaving them for the "New York University's new institution in Abu Ghraib". This was later corrected to "Abu Dhabi, Dubai", because Americans can't call themselves patriots if they don't get something geographical wrong.

According to a new Swedish study, men who get genital warts are cool: "With other male friends slapping on the shoulders and offering encouraging comments about 'success with the ladies', young men who contract diseases such as chlamydia or genital warts can come to view their infection as a badge of honour, rather than a serious health problem." A quick survey of the NOX office revealed that this is not the case with Arab men, since it is infinitely more difficult her to meet a girl who's cool with your pubic crabs. Lucky Scandinavians...